medicated.

& let me tell you, it'd better work. i felt awful this morning.. i looked in the mirror and i looked like john mccain and rosie o'donnell's love child. absolutely dreadful. but i saw the doctor today and got some medication that should work everything out.. hopefully the swelling will go down soon. i'm far too vain to be subjected to this.

in other news, this is our last few days with julia. :[ i'll miss her. it's been a lot of fun having her here, even though i've had to work a lot of the time. she's a cool girl. i'll be moving out all my stuff when she leaves.. so far i have 4 huge boxes moved out of strictly dvds and books. in other words, i have the feeling i'm going to be needing more boxes. lots more. i'm amazingly excited about the move, though. it's finally here.. after all months of talking about getting out of the house. it's not what i'd originally thought i'd be doing.. but then again when do things ever work out how you plan them to? oh well though. i'm happy with how things are going so far. and as far as i'm concerned, they'll only get better.

i may have a girl crush on marla singer but i do have a smidge of optimism. at this point, i'd be crazy not to.

have you ever heard a death rattle?

i keep drinking this dreadful lemon tea for my throat that burns but helps for about an hour.. but now my lymph nodes are being a bitch. it's like permanent lock jaw.. without the unseemly implications. if it wasn't for a certain someone cheering me up today i would have been pretty miserable.. so thanks for that, love. <3 i still think i need to be heavily medicated to shake this cold or whatever it is that i have.. but oh well. i'll settle for the tea for now.

just ask alice.

i've come to the decision that if i don't have an outlet that i just might lose my mind. so here we are, tada. and of course now that i've made this damned thing, i don't have the slightest clue what to put in it. but oh well, that's just how it goes, isn't it?

the past month has been totally insane. i've had extreme highs and lows that in the past would have merited a total emotional breakdown.. but somehow through it all i've come out okay. i'm still pretty confused about some things, but there you go. it's to be expected. what i do know is that right now i have a shot at being happy. i also know i'm not willing to ruin that by asking myself "what if?" this is a fresh start and i just need to take it for what it is.

come what may.